Today's funny :o)

A really BIG H/T to Donna!



As I get older, I realize:
 
#1  -  I talk to myself, because there are times I need expert advice.
 
#2  -  I consider "In Style" to be the clothes that still fit.
 
#3  -  I don't need anger management. I need people to stop pissing me off.
 
#4  -  My people skills are just fine. It's my tolerance for idiots that needs work.
 
#5  -  The biggest lie I tell myself is, "I don't need to write that down.  I'll    remember it."
 
#6  -  I have days when my life is just a tent away from a circus.
 
#7  -  These days, "on time" is when I get there.
 
#8  -  Even duct tape can't fix stupid - but it sure does muffle the sound.
 
#9  -  Wouldn't it be wonderful if we could put ourselves in the dryer for ten minutes, then come out wrinkle-free and three sizes smaller?
 
#10  -  Lately, I've noticed people my age are so much older than me.
 
#11  -  "Getting lucky" means walking into  a room and remembering why I'm there.
 
#12  -  When I was a child, I thought nap time was punishment.  Now it feels like a mini vacation.
 
#13  -  Some days I have no idea what I'm doing out of bed.
 
#14  -  I thought growing old would take longer
 
#15  -  Aging sure has slowed me down, but it hasn't shut me up.

 

 #16  -  I still haven't learned to act my age.

 

 

:o)