Today's funny :o)

H/T to Donna!



·  A thief who stole a calendar got twelve months.

 
·  When the smog lifts in Los Angeles U.C.L.A.

 
·  The batteries were given out free of charge.

 
·  A dentist and a manicurist married. They fought tooth and nail.

 
·  A will is a dead giveaway.

 
·  With her marriage, she got a new name and a dress.

 
·  A boiled egg is hard to beat.

 
·  When you've seen one shopping center you've seen a 
mall.

 
·  Police were summoned to a daycare center where a three-year-old was resisting a rest.

 
·  Did you hear about the fellow whose entire left side was cut off? He's all right now.

 
·  A bicycle can't stand alone; it's just two tired.

 
·  When a clock is hungry it goes back four seconds.

 
·  The guy who fell onto an upholstery machine is now fully recovered.

 
·  He had a photographic memory which was never developed.

 
·  When she saw her first strands of grey hair she thought she'd dye.

 
·  Acupuncture is a jab well done.  That's the point of it.

 
And the cream of the twisted crop: 

'Those who get too big for their pants will be totally exposed in the end'.

 

ALWAYS LAUGH WHEN YOU CAN...

IT IS CHEAP MEDICINE!

:o)